Watching two crash dummies rub up against each other is too overtly a horndog player reward, and one that simultaneously cheapens the work put into making these relationships feel so lived in.īecause these scenes are very much not sexual or remotely believable. Skip the awkward thrusting and moaning and-*shiver*-first-person kissing next time, please. But honestly, I wish CD Projekt Red had skipped out on these dumb montages in favor of shorter implied scenes. It's fun, picking apart these sex scenes, even knowing how difficult it must be to choreograph such an intimate thing in first-person using two clumsy 3D models. We open again on the two laying down, having just very clearly had sex, smoking or whatever, the illusion complete and nothing lost even without the preteen fantasy stage performance.Ĭyberpunk 2077 lifepaths : Which to chooseĬyberpunk 2077 map : What you need to knowĬyberpunk 2077 romance options (opens in new tab)Ĭyberpunk 2077 builds (opens in new tab) : Best so farĬyberpunk 2077 Braindance (opens in new tab) : How it worksĬyberpunk 2077 cars (opens in new tab) : Race around Night CityĬyberpunk 2077 hacking (opens in new tab) : How to do it But why the awkward half-measure? Play some provocative music, give the characters a flirty line or two, make some eyes, then cut to black. I mean, I don't need to see digital Keanu's genitals. It reads like aliens reenacting the human mating ritual with nothing but cave paintings and the back pages of your mom's Shape magazines circa 1995 as reference. Were the camera to zoom out we'd see Keanu Reeves dressed up like a biker slamming a wall of denim into Alt's ass. It's a lopsided affair too, with Silverhand's jeans staying on the whole time while Alt spins around nude in every which way in front of the guy. Even with Johnny and Alt flipping and thrusting right in front of me to chunky guitar riffs, all I could picture was Keanu Reeves on take 20 of grunting with pleasure into a studio mic. Meanwhile, Johnny Silverhand's flashback sex scene carries the torch forward for through-the-jeans dry-humpers everywhere. We learn about their history and kinks without a wacky montage or any bizarre deadeyed closeups. The camera doesn't needlessly linger, balancing the frame with Geralt and Yennefer as they flirt and reminisce before panning down and cutting to black. Take The Witcher 3's beloved unicorn sex scene, which focuses on the relationship between Geralt and Yennefer, cushioned (literally) by the characterization and comic relief the stuffed unicorn prop provides. Where you planning to put that, Geralt? (Image credit: CD Projekt) With only a few angles to work with, broadened a touch by the cameras in the tank, most shots are in your face and terrifying. Cyberpunk 2077's dedication to the first-person perspective at all times puts it in a tough spot here. I can see how the idea might've sounded fun in storyboard format, but unless videogame sex scenes get the cinematic World of Warcraft trailer treatment, they're still going to feel off. The overall vibe is early '00s late night Showtime channel softcore, with V and Panam springing into action like they'd been rehearsing for months. Another montage plays out in my mind, one revisiting every found footage horror movie I've seen. A porny lo-fi beat kicks in, peppered with reverberating moans and, horrifically, mouth sounds shuffled way too high in the mix.Īt one point the scene cuts to Panam's perspective, my V's cold, dead eyes illuminated in the soft green glow of night vision, mouth slightly agape, thrusting all the while. Going for it requires some amount of subtlety, which Cyberpunk 2077 enthusiastically rejects from the start. In Saudi Arabia and the UAE, however, there are many anti-LGBT laws, and homosexuality is a serious crime in these countries.3D game characters are still too stiff (sorry) to pose and animate for sex scenes. Risque advertisements were edited with a static effect.Īll other versions of the game in regions not mentioned above should be available uncensored, and censorship is optional. Explicit romance scenes containing nudity have been censored. In addition, adjustments to the size of male V's penis and pubic hair are unavailable in the Japanese console versions of the game. Indecent nudity and sight of dismemberment and internal human organs are always censored on the console versions of Cyberpunk 2077 due to CERO's rating guidelines. V is also unable to engage in homosexual relationships with other people. In the Middle Eastern versions of the game distributed in Saudi Arabia and the United Arab Emirates, V, the player character in the game, cannot be trans or non-binary.
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